Everyone has experienced some type of loneliness in their life. Sometimes it is hard to tell the difference between depression and loneliness itself, heck its even proven that they have very similar effects, yet one can easily lead to the other.
But how to you acknowledge it and what do you do to cope?
Quite often it is hard to pin-point what exactly is the root cause and why you are feeling this form of isolation. So take a minute and really self reflect on how you are truly feeling, and when do you feel it most. For me, typically this involves me opening up a computer and just letting my fingers go. From there I read over and break down all of my feelings and eventually they turn into articles just like this one.
Sometimes we are searching for that companionship, whether it be with friends or with a significant other. Someone to experience things with together and someone to be there to reach out to.
Other times its as simple as missing physical touch. Its amazing how many people are in need of that hug, to provide them that physical comfort that they are acknowledged and going to be okay, just like your parents did when you needed it most. But make sure you aren’t diving into a spontaneous, possibly dangerous sexual encounter, or pressurizing a soon-to-be regrettable relationship.
It can even be just a simple need of someone’s guidance or reassurance that you are doing well and on the right path. You can find this through friends, coworkers, or therapists. I highly recommend reaching out to a therapist, they will hit you with the true facts and really reassure those feelings you knew you needing tweaking.
Sometimes loneliness means wanting to run towards someone else, when in reality we are wanting to run away from ourselves . That feeling of wanting to dive into a relationship, in hopes that it will solve are issues and problems.
But why do we feel lonely in particular situations?
How come someone can feel lonely going to a party alone, an event or even to a restaurant. We feel incomplete and worry too much on what other peoples view of what we are doing. That unfortunate stigma that being alone means something is missing or not right. Give yourself a pep talk, listen to a motivational YouTube Video and step out of your comfort zone! Who knows, you may meet that special someone or a great longtime friend.
Reach out to help someone else!
You’d be amazed how much this can shift your emotional state and attitude towards life, and how you are feeling. Lending out a hand to someone who may need some help will give you that minor self-confidence to maybe get you to go try that climbing class you’ve been meaning to do. Being in that position and feeling those feelings yourself, you have the ability to truly sympathies for that person and being that person for them can shift your energy drastically.
Some practical tips for coping with loneliness
– You can reach out for more human (or other) contact
– You can embrace your alone time to the fullest by doing things you don’t feel like doing when other people are around
– Focus on others instead of yourself – being in touch with your feelings is great, but if it gets overwhelming, some short-term distractions work better.
– Write a journal and let go of some thoughts
– Learn to comfort yourself, find out what you like and need
– Don’t wait until you get overwhelmed and make some plans about coping with loneliness in times when you feel better
– Talk to a therapist or join a support group
The best personal advice I can say is don’t think about what other people think! Who cares what they believe is right or wrong. Make a list of things you’ve wanted to do, you’ve wanted to complete or you’ve wanted to try. Don’t wait to find someone to do them with, do like Nike says, JUST DO IT!
Yes this can be looked at as a distraction, but at least you’ll start feeling self-esteem, self-worth and self accomplishment. Sitting there dwelling on what you miss and need, isn’t going to get you anywhere.
If you or someone you know is going through this, please know that it is common, and we are all here, myself included 🙂